it's been so long already and sometimes i wonder why is it that i still can't be myself around them. three years is a long time to be distant and it is so hard to retain this distance when social circles dictate otherwise.
is this distance necessary? i hardly know the answer myself. but it is a reflex action that occurs whenever i'm with them. i do not understand them and neither do they. we have always been skewed lines and i wonder how did i hope to be part of them once. still, mistakes are made, and lessons are learnt. it is time to move on. but am i moving on or moving back? this is a question i really need to answer because it is something that keeps coming back, time and again.
and once again, i remind myself that this is not solely about me. there are others too.
