Wednesday, July 05, 2006 6:54 PM
i hate it.
this thing is seriously affecting my studies. not that it was very good to begin with. but now i have to make double the effort and that puts strain on not only my mental self, but my physical self. like what the? you caused me to skip lessons and now you're complaining?? this is horrible. how i wish i could live without the restraints of my physical body. especially since it is slowing the progressing of my mind.
seriously, God is rather fair. the reason He allows serious illnesses to occur mainly among the elderly is because they have far too much time and energy to waste. compared to a schooling child like me or a working adult with a family to support. we may be younger and therefore assumed to have boundless energy, but we too are humans, flesh and blood, and we tire. so if we were to be given long-term illnesses, imagine the toll on the body not only due to the illness. the stress and frustration due to never ending deadlines, the inability to understand what's thrown in front of you all because you didn't attend 2 lessons. it's horrible, trust me. and i just wish the vip was half as stressful, or that it's the earlier half of the year. cos it's term 3 and the momentum is picking up, gearing towards eoys. which means twice the number of tests, assignments, tasks, hwk, projects, research thrown to us. plus the fact that you can't go to school. imagine the migraine this is going to cause? it's no wonder i'm thinking of shooting myself. just that i don't own a gun and i do not want to jump. ohwells. i'll just have to get that bad dream out of my head i guess. :(
